What are your relationships teaching you?

More importantly what are YOU teaching your relationships?  Relationships teach us so many things about ourselves.  They can be projections of the part of ourselves we don’t wish to accept.  They can be a lineage of doing things in a certain way, until someone wakes you up, and you say why are you doing or acting like your mother/father?  Take the good, higher stuff, but reconsider the stuff that just doesn’t make sense.  It is not about judging, it is about discernment the highest good for you.  

Yes, this area is a big one.  Relationships teach us how to treat each other.  In the past, it has been learnt through positive or negative reinforcement.  This happens in families, cultures, societies, and lineages.  Often we have learnt how to handle relationships from those closest to us.  Most families are dysfunctional unless that have chosen to wake up.  The challenge in the past, there has been some family members that may be awake and others not.  This is not a judgment, just a fact.  This is the same for cultures, societies and lineages.

When there is a continued pattern over years of positive or negative reinforcement this makes these patterns more noticeable.  What part do you play, and what part do others play?  Some examples:

Do you not like confrontation, so you avoid conversations?

Do you attack another verbally, because you know they will back away?

Do you walk on the proverbial egg shells, because you don’t want the negative outburst?   

Do you continually take your partner for granted, because they have always have done the cooking or the cleaning, or been the provider?

Are you generally a patience and caring person, but you are tired of your partner not returning this same patience and caring?

Do you speak your truth, without consideration to the impact on another?  Or are you the reverse, do you not speak for fear of your impact?

What would be your example?

Take a moment.  Take a breath.  What is your lesson?  What are you feeling?  Are you hurt, frustrated, sad, disappointed, angry or something else?  You can’t change another person, but you can change how you react or respond.  Reactions are normally what occurs in the moment.  To respond from a higher level in the moment takes practice, and when someone pushes your buttons, responding will rarely occur.

When you are calm, peaceful and centred, it is easier to respond, then when your buttons are being pushed.  Those closest to you, will always be the first to press your buttons, because they know what needs pressing.  STOP.  Be thankful.  It’s just another button you have now been made aware of.  Laugh, this emotion is not you, it is just letting you know that there is something for you to learn.

Note in these current energies, any left over rubbish is being shown to you.  Instead of getting emotional, process it, learn and let go.  It is not up to you to change another, but you CAN teach them how to treat you, by what you let be acceptable.  If something is no longer acceptable, speak your truth in a calm and rational manner.  It is then the other persons choice whether they are willing to act differently or not.  Don’t get into a yelling match, it rarely solves anything, and causes more hurt.  Take space to find your words of truth, and then speak them without blame, but just fact.

Ultimately, everyone has choice on how they consciously choose to be treated, and how they will consciously choose to treat another.  Find a way back to love, light, peace and truth.  Remember THINK – True, Helpful, Inspiring, Necessary, and is it KIND.  Be mindful what thoughts you share.  It is one thing to think them, and another to speak them.  If a person is empathetic they will feel them anyway, whether spoken or not.  If a person is telepathic they will hear them and transmit them, so being mindful of thought is essential.  Filtering is essential, and healthy boundaries are necessary for all empaths.  What will be your choice?

Other Resources: Defences, Misunderstood, Miscommunication, Lasting Relationships, Seeking Love,